2:30 am...nothing useful

I am one of those people who feels that in life, you only take with you a few friends that stick with you through and through. In this past year I lost one job and found another and I seem to run into the same thing over and over. Originally I couldn't hang with my friend co-workers because I wasn't 21 y/o. When I did become legal, it didn't seem to phase those who called me friend. One person, who I thought I connected with really well, ended up moving away right after I got fired from my last job. Now that she lives in another city and is in a relationship, almost all communication has stopped. Others who talked about doing things with me in the future simply didn't contact me even after I tried communicating with them. Now that I am at my new job, I've made friends and have gotten to know some really strong and fun women, but as narcissistic of me to think that I'm just as fun, awesome and experienced as these women, I feel that the age gap is what is dragging me down. They talk about their kids and divorces and foreclosures and bankruptcy and I just don't know what to say. The divorce thing is a touchy subject, being a child of a bad one, but I still have some social insight as to how to handle a bad situation and see the light at the end. I just wish I was thought of more often I guess. Even my best friend I feel rarely thinks of me. I think of her all the time but I'm just to wrapped up in this paranoid feeling that I am butting into other peoples' lives. I just don't know what to do. I guess sitting and playing Halo with the bf can only stimulate me so far.

Circumcision is the surgical removal of the male genital foreskin that has been a custom in many cultures for centuries that exploits, for some, religious and/or health benefits. Perhaps the biggest proponent of why many agree with circumcision is hygiene. The foreskin, if not properly cleaned and examined can harbor bacteria and lead to infections not only to the area but also of the urethra. In recent years, studies have shown that circumcision may help prevent urinary tract infections, penile cancer and HIV (Kinkade et. al., 2005; Loughlin 2005)* (Auvert et. al., 2005l; Baeten et al., 2005; Reynolds et al., 2004)*. Opponents to circumcision say that it is an unnecessary and traumatic procedure for an infant to go through. Also, the possibility that something could go wrong in the procedure may impede that individuals ability to perform sexually as well as in daily life. More recently the American Association of Pediatrics modified its position on circumcision by shifting from neutrality to a position of moderate opposition to this medical procedure (Task Force on Circumcision, 1999)*.
I personally am on the fence about this issue. I read the AAP statement and agree with it on most levels. If there is something wrong or potentially something that can affect or infect the newborn, I say circumcise. If not then I really do not see the need with putting a newborn through a painful procedure. Along the lines of cleanliness, I can see the perspective from those in an older time or 3rd world countries where hygiene is/was a serious issue, but today, especially in developed countries, with the right education I feel the risk and issue can be avoided. I also feel that alteration of the body should be perused, and chosen to be done, by the individual it is being done to. In a personal example, I asked to have braces as a teenager because I was uncomfortable about my teeth not because my parents felt it was necessary. Perhaps circumcision in today’s age is more cosmetic then necessary. I talked to two men, one was circumcised and the other was not. The one who was circumcised stated, and I quote, “Men who are not circumcised are uncut heathens.” His answer may be extreme, but it may be molded perhaps by the social norm and possibly his own idea of what the male genitalia should look like. The other individual who was uncircumcised said he has lived comfortably without any complications or issues his whole life and sees no need in performing a traumatic and butchering procedure on a newborn. He also stated his parents decision was divided until the mother showed the father a video of the procedure and how painful and traumatic it is. He also said being uncircumcised has never been an issue in his sex life and would never consider being circumcised in the future. With all the new technology and educational information circulating, where does circumcision fit in the perspective of necessity versus cosmetic medicine?

Evoultion

Sex sells; when it comes to advertising, companies don’t hesitate to juice up their products by adding sexual elements to make a better profit. They can be blatant or subtle, but in the end it has one common goal. Most sexual content in advertising trivializes sex while reinforcing the idea that only young, hard male and female bodies merit attraction, with the exception of advertising aimed at the large consumer groups for aging baby boomers. (Crooks & Baur, 2008, p.20) This idea then becomes an issue of negative and false images imprinted in the consumer. More noticeably there is a bigger, indirect impact on young adolescent girls. I know this has become an increasingly disturbing issue, when I first saw the video/commercial “Evolution”, launched by the Dove® Self Esteem Fund. I knew about the air brushing and intense hours models sit being transformed, but the video really puts things into perspective of how fake the industry is. I’ve read more and more about the Dove® Self Esteem Fund and the research that was conducted by About Real Girls, Real Pressure: A National Report on the State of Self-Esteem, the results are overwhelming. Seven in ten girls believe they are not good enough or do not measure up in some way, including their looks, performance in school and relationships with friends and family members. (Kearney-Cooke, PhD, 2008) I read in the book that advertising helps break taboos. (Crooks &Baur, 2008, p.20) But I feel this statement should be treaded lightly when studies like Real Girls, Real Pressure come out with these staggering numbers. However, I’m thoroughly happy that Dove® has started a fund to help troubled girls face their personal demons and insecurities.

Loaded

In my psychology class my teacher made this statement: "Anyone who believes in demons or spirits is ignorant."As I was surfing CNN.com I came across an artice praising President Obama for in cluding the word "non-believers" in his innagural address.Walking to the library on campus I briefly heard one sentence of a conversation saying, "It's not like I'm saying I don't believe in god..."In one week I was bombarded with flashes of challenging faith. I've often been asked the question as to what religion I practice. For the most part I lie because the truth is I don't know what to believe. Our culture is so wide and diverse that I feel it is impossible to say any one peron belongs to any one religion. I am in no way saying that anyone is wrong but rather just needs to study more. I myself was born and babtized Babtist. I went to Sunday school and learned everthing there was to learn at that age. When my parents divorced and the viel of Santa and the Easter bunny was lifted I found myself questioning my faith as well. After all, my father did committ adultry. When he remarried a Catholic and I was declared a bastard child, I became very jaded with organized religion. More so because I was drug out of bed every Sunday morning by my evil step mother to go to mass and listen and be merry with people I niether cared for or liked. Throughout junior high I became very dark and often refered myself as an athiest more and more studying things like astrology and tarot and paganism. As I got older and was going throuhg high school the more studying I did in the way of science and life I was convinced that evolution and science was the answer to the great question and the big bang theory was self explanitory. However, the more I got into my medical classes the more I was exposed to the wonderful world of diversity and learning everything from diets and death rituals to birthing practices and medicinal uses. Another big step I have taken in my journey through discovery happened when I went to college. I almost got sucked into the Church of Jesus Christ of Later Day Saints. I read the book of Mormon and attended classes and church. It scared me how involved I allowed myself to become immersed. What broke me was probably the 10% income thing. I thought, if God wanted 10% of my income, when the United States govt already takes 23% from every paycheck, how am I supposed to support myself? With sugar and spice and everything nice? The biggest lesson I learned was I started questioning things again. So here I am again asking who is right?I don't think anyone will ever know what lies in the great beyond or if we really do just lay in a hole filled with dirt. I don't know that I believe there is one answer or one reason as to why or how. I think each culture and religion has at least one thing right and many things wrong. I wear the Eye of Ra because maybe it does bring me protection. I have the Holy Trinity tattooed because perhaps it brings balance to my life. I also have a pagan star because it symbolizes friendship. I have a bracelet with a fish carved of jade because the Chinese say it brings luck. I wear it for hard tests. I think that the Saints and Jesus Christ were real people who did amazing things and gave hope during periods in history filled with extreme darkness and despair. And as far as the stars go, I embrace my Scorpio side with pride and endulge in my inner mystical sexy side.I say to those who believe in something, keep believing. You're not ignorant. Faith will do amazing things to the human mind and spirit. And for many around the world it allows them to get up in the moring. I say to those that think anyone who believes is ignorant to step into my shoes and watch someone die with all their family standing around the bed and tell me they don't feel something different in the air. Or please, travel to Balgonie Castle, one of the most haunted places on earth, and stare the Green Lady right on the face and feel your breath leave your body. And as far as our president goes, thanks for reinforcing people's ideas to be unimaginative and not embrace that our country was founded on belief system that has allowed our country to prosper. I don't care about offending people. "In God We Trust" is a trademark for our country, not a religious statement. So keep putting your St. Christopher's on your dashboard and wearing your guardian angel pins. I say put that henna on your hands and wear that dot on your head. Dance naked around a bon fire during the solstice and fast for days. For those still on a winding path of uncertainty I say believeing in something, even if it's your goldfish, makes you ten times more interesting than the next person who doens't care about anything. I want to know if the fish does any tricks.